Manchester 1980 and the music world is rocked by the death of Joy Division’s Ian Curtis.
But , as the saying goes , every cloud has a silver lining and as a young singer about town I fancied my chances of filling the tragic frontman’s boots.
The remaining Joy Division lads - Hooky , Barney Rubble and the other one - held a series of auditions around the north of England , and after impressing them with my version of ’ Oops Outside Your Head ’ I was pretty confident about getting the gig.Even a recent chronic bout of hemerroids couldn’t stop me from feeling pretty good about my chances.
There was just one problem. Another singer called Stu Francis was also on their shortlist - and he’d done his homework.
Hooky had already told me that the band wanted to change direction musically and produce more danceable stuff. What I didn’t know was that Stu Francis had already written a song designed to impress the JD lads … and it was personal .
Francis had been told about my little problem and couldn’t resist alluding to it in his song .
In the end neither of us got the job. They thought it would be cheaper to carry on as they were . But I had the last laugh….
Stu Francis’s two female dancers and me ended up at The Flying Horse in Weatherfield and it wasn’t me grapes that ended up getting squeezed…..it was me nuts !